Waking from my sleep
Its dark outside
I can feel you
I can hear you
I enjoy these moments with you
I listen to your words
Your making sense of things
The hope fills me
I wish for these dreams
Your talking about
Take my hand
Everything will work out
Everything will be alright
I want to believe in those possibilities
While I drift back to sleep
I tell you what my heart is feeling
I love you
In the cold light of a morning sky
Drifting awake
The doubts rush in
It doesn't make sense anymore
My thoughts are filled with different words
Hurtful words
I can't feel you, see you or hear you
The struggle erupts
I want to believe in those dreams
I want to revel in the joy they bring
But forced to face this reality
Your not here
You'll never be here
Its just irrational thoughts
Lying to myself
Pretending
I don't know if I can find the words
That describe
The feelings that now fills my heart
If like my brother
I'd found the patience
Picked up a guitar
Learned to play
I could write you a song
Filled with those feelings
The beautiful soulful
Sad mournful sounds
That his guitar can play
Spilling over
Tears run down my face
When I hear it
I have moved on
I have worked to heal
Moments such as these
This secret I keep
When missing you grows too much
Feelings can't be contained
I know your wandering this earth
The grief doesn't make sense
But that's where I am
I don't even know you
But here I am missing you